It Is Brain Surgery January 31, 2009
Posted by naughtwirthreeding in Humor.comments closed
Let’s say you need brain surgery, who would you want to do it? A doctor, of course, but not just any doctor. You wouldn’t just flip open the phone book. You’d do your homework, you’d ask for recommendations from people whose opinions you trust, maybe inquire of local universities or medical association representatives, and once you had the matter in hand, you’d narrow it down and make your choice.
Would you leave that decision in the hands of your next-door neighbor? If he or she is the one making the choice about who does your operation, do you trust them to make a good decision on your behalf? Hopefully you do, and hopefully that person realizes the severity of the situation and takes the process as seriously as if it were for a member of their own family. Hopefully.
Would you leave that decision in the hands of the people on your block? Or your apartment complex? Your condo association? What about the parents of the kids who go to the same school as your kids?
Would you trust that decision to the people who happened to walk into the mall between the hours of 10am and 6pm on a given Tuesday? You’d stand by the door with a clipboard and hand out slips with the names of the possible candidates, and when they left to go to their cars they could hand it back to you with their selection. Whomever they pick does the procedure. Do you think a cross-section of your local community has the presence of mind and understands the seriousness of the situation to arrive, collectively, at the right choice?
Ah, but I’ve just created a problem. Who do you put on the ballot, and more importantly, how do these mall-goers know if these guys are any good? We can’t necessarily exclude any doctors based on reputation, he or she might be brilliant. But you can’t just include anybody, the selection sheet you hand out would be miles long. Oh well, let’s leave it that anybody who wants to be considered will be put on the sheet. As for whether they’re any good, we’ll have to leave that part up to the mall-rats. They have to take some responsibility in this process, and we don’t want to unduly influence their decision. It should be okay, I’m sure they’ll make an informed choice… somewhere between Jamba Juice and Old Navy.
How’s that sound? Ready for surgery?
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I don’t care if it’s for the local solid waste planning commission or President of the United States: voting should not be left in the hands of the clueless, the disinterested and the ill-informed. Voting is for people who make it a priority to be properly informed. Voting is for people with critical reasoning skills. Voting is for the people who realize the severity of the consequences. Voting is for people who make their education a priority. And most of all, voting is for people who give a crap every day that *isn’t* election day.
We put so much focus on who is on the ballot: what we should really focus on is who gets to cast a ballot. The larger the sample, the more the results will skew towards the lowest common denominator. Why should we settle for the lowest common denominator when choosing a President? It IS brain surgery at that level. It’s important, for some people it’s life-altering. Including those among us who are barely able to figure out who is buried in Grant’s tomb in making such important decisions is foolish, and limits our ability to get the best qualified candidate into the White House. The last eight years should serve as a stunningly vibrant example of what I’m talking about.
Voting should be restricted to only those persons who have earned a baccalaureate degree from an accredited four-year institution; who have held a full-time job for at least one consecutive year; and who have filed at least one Federal tax return. These decisions are just as important to us as a people as if we were undergoing brain surgery, and one glance at the condition we find this country in should tell you why. This idea goes against most everything this country was founded on, but it’s an idea that deserves discussion. These decisions will affect people’s lives: it’s time we stopped letting them be decided by whoever happens to wander into the mall on a given Tuesday in November.
Stick To Your Guns January 28, 2009
Posted by naughtwirthreeding in Humor, Life, News & Events, Politics, The Economy.comments closed
“We defeat the British Empire by ignoring it.” — Alan Rickman portraying Irish President Eamon Devalera, sitting in a British prison, 1915
“Just ignore your sister and she’ll go away.” — my mom, standing in the kitchen, 1974
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Let’s say Christ himself appeared in human form on earth, not for the Reckoning, but to lend a hand. He produced a cure for cancer and AIDS. He made the oceans drinkable, and the deserts arable. He solved the problem of safe, clean, renewable energy by unlocking the secrets of cold fusion. He set the sinners on the right path, and praised the righteous. Before leaving, he offered up a message of hope, that all are welcome in God’s Kingdom of Heaven.
The people would all rejoice, right?
Well, almost everyone. Republicans would say that he was interfering in the free market, taking away incentives for innovation, and rewarding careless and deviant behavior.
President Obama is going to some lengths to work out bi-partisan solutions to the problems the nation is facing. While that is a noble goal, he needs to understand that no matter how lofty the intended outcome, there will be some jaded crack-pots who grouse about it.
The Republicans that remain in Congress are going “all-in” with the 2010 election. They are betting their political careers on the Obama stimulus plan failing. If it does, they will go back to their districts and shout, “I said it wouldn’t work, and I didn’t vote for it!” from every mountain and mole-hill.
Of course, if it succeeds, their opponents will be able to say, “President Obama, the leader of MY party, saved our *sses. No thanks to my opponent, who seemed to think he knew better…”. I suppose Obama’s move is somewhat shrewd, because he’s adding a nail to the coffin: “We asked for Republican input and support, but they weren’t having any…” I only hope he doesn’t waste too much time trying to actually convince anyone, or water down the end result by removing useful provisions the GOP objects to just for the sake of objecting.
Eamon Devalera was right: by ignoring the British Empire, Ireland was able to sign a treaty granting them a peaceful transition to independence, notwithstanding the brutal civil war that ensued thereafter. Obama’s plan should be the same: stick to your guns no matter how many people are sniping from the shadows. Lay out the objectives, get expert opinions, devise a plan of attack, and set the wheels in motion. Make minor adjustments for changing conditions, and in time the intended result will come. Ignore the bitching and moaning from whatever quarter, and see it through to the ultimately successful end.
History will show this as a turning point for our country. As things improve the voices of dissent and despair will be silenced, ultimately proving my mother to be correct also.
Yes, mom, I said it. You were RIGHT, okay? Are you happy now?
Sheesh…
Eggs Benedict January 25, 2009
Posted by naughtwirthreeding in Humor, Life, Money & Investing, News & Events, Politics, The Economy.comments closed
So! Here we are. It’s President Obama now, whether you like it or not. So, Chicken Little: has the sky fallen yet?
* * * * *
SUPPORT THE PULL-OUT!!!
…because if you don’t, you’re UN-AMERICAN!
Hey, that was the argument you used when we invaded, all of you Bush-supporters. Rather hypocritical to change your opinion now…
DON’T YOU THINK???
* * * * *
Anyone who is currently predicting that the country will collapse under the new Obama Administration does not get to participate in the upcoming economic recovery. We have all of your names, and any money you earn between now and 2016 will be seized by the Treasury on a quarterly basis. We’re giving the proceeds to the ACLU. And if you put up a stink, we’ll make you wear a turban too.
* * * * *
I want to explain something to the people running around inciting panic over President Obama’s plan for universal health care coverage.
President Obama’s plan is simple: open up the U.S. government health benefits plan to anyone who wants it (paid for out of the consumer’s pocket) or anyone who can’t afford private coverage (paid for by the government). Nobody — NOBODY!!! — will be forced to sign up or change their current coverage if they are happy with what they have.
And so what exactly is the federal government’s health benefits plan? Have you looked it up? Have you actually done the research? Well, I have…
The health benefits plan offered by the federal government is just like the plan you would have at work, only bigger. It offers dozens upon dozens of choices (!!!) between all of the big private insurance companies’ (!!!) insurance offerings. PPO, HMO, MSA, fee-for-service, you name it. And all the big names you are familiar with: Blue Cross, Humana, United Health Care, they’re all there. Every one of them a privately-administered, publicly-available plan. Noe one of them is administered by a government agency.
So: either you knew this already and you’re running around deliberately spewing lies; or you had no idea and you’re unwittingly running around spewing the lies fed to you by fascist, hate-mongering right-wing operatives.
Either way, shut the f*ck up.
* * * * *
Let’s keep Guantanamo open. When we’re done prosecuting everybody in the Bush Administration, anyone who is convicted can go there!
* * * * *
One of the things that is going to be a big deal over the next eight years is Justices retiring from the U.S. Supreme Court. Most of the predicted retirees come from the liberal wing of the Court, so barring unforeseen circumstances, not much will change.
I know you gay-bashers and bible-thumpers were hoping that one of your right-wing puppets would be nominating the next batch of Justices. Well, tough poopie. Anyone nominated in the next eight years will support Roe v. Wade, handgun bans, and a fundamental belief in the separation of church and state. Is that good? You bet. Why? Because 80% of Americans are pro-choice, believe in reasonable gun control, and oppose school prayer. It’s a twisted set of circumstances that four of the sitting Justices consistently rule against the will of the nation. But we’ll fix that soon enough.
Gotta go. I’m setting up a home-made nuclear reactor in the house next to John Roberts, and setting up a standing order of eggs benedict with extra hollandaise to be delivered to Antonin Scalia every morning at 7:30.
